This was my life before....

I have my children though not of my own. I was a surrogate father of four kids. Three boys and a girl.
I have my means to support them, I have a continuous job.
I enjoyed being called "Dad"
I have a family of my own.
I enjoy being worried with my kids,
I enjoy their company and love
I enjoy their courtesy.
I also enjoy scolding them....
My dream and ambition is that one day I can bring them with me in a vacation to Rome, and to Spain.  I strongly wish that one day this might happen.  That in every Meteor Shower, I go up to our rooftop and to wait for a falling star , to wish that this ambition, this inspiration of mine may be blessed by nature and may come true..

I remember in one of our vacation in a Beach Resort in Batangas.  I brought my children with me.  One night, we went to the seashore.  We sat on the sand and gaze towards the dark and starry sky.  And as a star fell, I embraced them tightly and wished that one day I may bring them with me to Rome, and to Spain.  But eventually that superstition did not help. After they have grown they choose their own paths in life.

My daughter left me for a boyfriend.  My eldest son and my second son left me to pursue the whims of their freedom.  And my youngest son left me to follow his own passion.

For my job I am having a hard time to find one.  I always face myself daily and ask myself what happened to me?  Why am I so unlucky in life.........  Yes, I pitied myself.  With this, I always turn to God to pray and beg him to have mercy over my life...

In my powerlessness, in my inability to do something, in my helplessness.  I turn to him and I try to listen. I am trying to reflect.